Fish Jokes Contract All | Expand All
If fish lived on land, which country would they live in?
Finland.
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Fsh.
What did the boy octopus say to the girl octopus?
I want to hold your hand hand hand hand hand hand hand hand.
Why are fish so smart?
Because they live in schools.
Where do fish keep their money?
In the river bank.
What fish are musical?
Tuna fish.
What fish is most valuable?
A goldfish.
Which fish go to heaven when they die?
Angelfish!
What happened to the cold jellyfish?
It set!
What did the sardine call the submarine?
A can of people!
Why are dolphins cleverer than humans?
Within 3 hours they can train a man to stand at the side of a pool and feed them fish!
Why are gold fish orange?
The water makes them rusty!
What kind of noise annoys an oyster?
A noisy noise annoys an oyster! (Try saying that fast!)
What day do fish hate?
Fry-day.
Where does seaweed look for a job?
In the 'Kelp-wanted' adds!
A man was stopped by a game warden in Northern Minnesota...
A man was stopped by a game warden in Northern Minnesota recently with two buckets of fish leaving a lake well known for its fishing. The game warden asked the man, "Do you have a license to catch those fish?" The man replied to the game warden, "No, sir. These are my pet fish." "Pet fish?!" the warden replied. "Yes, sir. Every night I take these fish down to the lake and let them swim around for a while. I whistle and they jump back into their buckets, and I take em home."
"That's a bunch of hooey! Fish can't do that!" The man looked at the game warden for a moment, and then said, "Here, I'll show you. It really works." "O.K. I've GOT to see this!" the game warden replied. The man poured the fish in to the water and stood and waited. After several minutes, the game warden turned to the man and said, "Well?" "Well, what?" the man asked. "When are you going to call them back?" the game warden prompted. "Call who back?" the man asked. "The FISH." "What fish?" the man asked.
